Can you pinpoint the change between you and your spouse? Do you feel that searing pain when you watch other couples in love? You are not alone. Thankfully, here we offer you the best tips to develop coping skills. They will help you enjoy a harmonious married life.
When you start, the couple is happy and full of goals and the future. Why are you unhappy now? Follow me, and you may yet catch up with your marriage goals.
Tips to Develop Coping Skills
Is your marriage at a point you thought it would never get? Are you considering an open marriage? However, you are lucky to be here. We can help you save your marriage.
Here are some tips dedicated to helping you revive and sustain your relationship so that you and your loved one will be happy.
1. Be More of a Listener
Lesbians have this unique motherly instinct, especially since both partners are women. Go ahead and use your maternal instincts to listen to your partner more. Connect with them more. Be motherly, sympathetic, and attentive to their needs. It will improve your relationship.
Encourage your partner to be more open about their feelings as you listen to them more. Talk to each other openly as friends. You will find that this can heal many hurts and wounds and improve your relationship.
2. Be Accountable.
Any relationship will only work well with accountability. Refrain from focusing only on what your partner did wrong. Instead, account for your shortcomings as well. And please, don’t discuss your issues with friends or relatives before discussing them with your lover.
While at it, do not use abrasive or insulative language. Be kind with your words, considerate of your partner’s feelings, and honest. That is being accountable!
3. Give Your Spouse Space
Two healthy human adults living together are bound to get on each other’s nerves at some point. Is this abnormal? Absolutely not! Does it mean that your marriage has failed? No, it doesn’t.
Sometimes, the aggravation could be your fault. Other times, it will be your lover’s mistake. Give each other additional space to assess the emotions. The keyword? Communicate, communicate, communicate!
4. Be aware of Stigmas Related to Your Sexual Orientation.
You will need to recognize and beware of Stigmas related to the sexual choices of lesbian, transgender, and gay marriages. Sometimes, whether to hide the relationship or come out in the open, the sense of conflict may cause friction between you and your lover.
In the end, let the two of you try to make sense of the conflicted feelings. Everybody else is entitled to their opinion anyway. Focus on your lover first.
5. Beware of Microaggressions!
Microaggressions are snide comments made by colleagues, friends, and even family members. If your social circle isn’t diverse enough to accommodate the Gay, Lesbian, Queer, and Bisexual community, you must adapt to these microaggressions.
Although they may be sensitive, refrain from taking them to heart and letting them affect your relationship with your lover. Remember, you cannot control people’s opinions, right?
However, if these microaggressions become overly insensitive and negative, visit a counselor. Be sure to use one who is aware of microaggressions to help you to deal better with society.
6. Use of Affirmative Therapy
Although therapists and psychologists have no history with the gay and lesbian community, the American Psychology Association has adopted guidelines for gay, transgender, and lesbian clients. The 21 policies each support gender-affirmative therapy. This therapy is also fondly known in psychology circles as ‘Come As You Are.’
This therapy will help your marriage to your lover and will not attempt to demean or convert you to the assumed ‘Straight Marriage.’ If you ever need counseling, use a professional counselor from APA’s qualified team of therapists. They will know how to support your relationship with your lover and give you helpful counseling, so your marriage can thrive.
FAQs
1. How much do I benefit from expert marital advice?
All marriages of all genders are complicated, mainly due to the influence of the community you happen to find yourself. Therefore, it takes work to maintain a healthy relationship, even if you dearly want to. Talking to an expert marital counselor will help you clear most of the stumbling blocks on your journey to a happy marriage.
2. When should we, as a couple, seek counseling for our marriage?
As soon as you find communication gaps and feel uncomfortable in your marriage, seek expert advice. Seek a professional counselor.
3. What is Couples Therapy?
While the counselor will do their best to fix your relationship, it is up to you, the couple, to work together towards this goal. Although most marriage counselors structure the counseling program individually, the most crucial thing in Couple Therapy is for the couple to meet the counselor as a team.
4. What is the most important thing to remember about couples therapy?
The vital thing to remember about a couple’s marriage counseling is that it will not be a one-time, one-meeting solution. You and your spouse should be prepared to work with the counselor for weeks, months, or even longer if necessary.
So, How Good Are the Tips to Have a Harmonious Marriage Life?
Like most other tips, these will work with you, not for you. You must choose to be part of the solution for your marriage to be happy and harmonious. Please take the necessary steps when communication gets broken to revive it. Go further and seek counseling when you feel either lack of communication or other factors endanger your marriage. Good luck!
