Chivalry is one of the oldest and most enduring values that men have. It’s also most misunderstood. Many people believe in the idea of chivalry, especially men, but aren’t sure exactly what it means to them.
Chivalry is something thing that everyone knows about, and something that everyone wants to know more about. But what is it really? Where did it come from and why is it so revered? Being chivalrous is one of those subjects that almost every culture believes in, yet little know anything about.
To begin with, let’s define what Chivalry actually is. Chivalry is “the practice of showing respect or treating a woman better”. This is a nice definition, but it doesn’t cover all of the issues. Chivalry is not tied to any specific notion or tradition, but there are a few things that seem to be attached to it.
Most people think that chivalry is related to love. But is this always the case? It is commonly said that it is, but the two are not always seen as relating to each other specifically. If you were to just look back at history, you would note that chivalry is often associated with love, but not specifically. For instance, Sir Lancelot was considering a knight because he paid his lady Erleott a token of love before his marriage to her, but it was mostly because he realized that she would not return his love if he returned home.
Chivalry is also often associated with religion. This is a nice interpretation, but only partially true. Chivalry is religious in the sense that the followers of a specific faith would do things in a respectful way. They would speak politely to each other and they would listen to each other’s ideas on faith. It did not happen much, but some of them did it.
The thing that all definitions agree on though, is that chivalry is not soft and nice. Sometimes it seems like chivalry is for women. Men will do nice things for women, and even pay the bills for them when they are unable to do so for themselves. It does not mean that the men are soft and nice, it just means that they understand and respect that a woman is a person who has needs and wants to be treated with respect. Sometimes they forget about their own needs in the name of kindness.
Sometimes men are just too stubborn to do the right thing, and this can be a problem in relationships. Too many times, women will put up with men who are uncaring and unkind simply because they do not know any better. If someone has truly learned to treat others well and to see the good in people, then a time will come when there is not much to be done about being kind only to oneself.
This does not mean that modern chivalry is a bad thing. It is the only modern way that people have defined and forged a special bond between each another, especially between a prince and a princess. In modern culture, chivalry is considered to be an art form that is passed down from generation to generation. In today’s world, it is still important, but most men know it is not necessary to work to achieve it.
In general, modern chivalry men sense when a woman is sweet, or rather when she is being overly coy and making him feel stupid for asking her out. He might also recognize when she is not as sweet as she seems and might be less inclined to be receptive to his advances. The trick is to know how to read women and be aware of her moods well enough, whether she is up for some dating, romance, or not. If she is, he should take the time to take advantage of it and date her, but if she is not, then he should move on.
The worst thing that can happen to a man trying to show his women some chivalry is to get rejected. Women are generally very good at picking up on subtle hints. Men who think they are being pulled into a bar by a pretty woman are likely to get the “run around” from her. This is a sure way to let a guy understand that there is something else going on and that he should keep his head down and not pursue a woman who does not want him to.
Unfortunately, a guy sometimes does not know the right chivalrous things to say the right time to catch a woman’s attention. For this reason, some men have tried to pull in their date by promising to pay her a surprise visit. While this can work to some degree, women tend to know when this type of ruse is just a play, so they will know before they even give a guy the time of day. For all these reasons, knowing how to strike up a conversation with women first time can be a big plus in terms of getting the results you want from a date.
